It's 30th day in medicine HJ.Mawra asked if I wanted to got to the trip.It's something I would suddenly get all excited about but this time,I didn't feel like going.It felt pointless.Going to functions,trips seemed pointless to me in first year MBBS too because I felt overwhelmed and disappointed.Overwhelmed at the no of thing I needed to learn and disappointed by my own laziness.The question was a like Proust's lemon cake to me,it stirred the inhibiting thoughts of my 5-year-old-self,I understood why everything seemed pointless to me then.And i wasn't ready to do much about anything that seemed fruiutful.
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